Belonging is more than just a warm fuzzy feeling, it is essential for survival. Human newborns are among the most defenceless creatures on the planet, totally dependant on their parents to meet their basic needs for far longer than most mammals. At the int of birth, the 'love' hormone oxytocin floods the mothers body and bonds her to her baby. That bond is so powerful that despite extreme fatigue, frustration and constant disruptions to normal routine, the mother continues to care for this helpless and puts its needs above her own. Studies have now also found that a similar hormonal change occurs in fathers, likewise bonding them to their child, increasing their protectiveness of their family and decreasing risk taking behaviours. Physical touch has also been shown to be as vital to infant development has nourishment. Harlow's classic study showed that orphaned monkeys spent far greater time attached to a soft, warm 'surrogate' contraption with a fleecy blanket wrapped around it that did not provide nourishment to the similar surrogate with out the fleece that did provide norishment. Harlow observed that the monkeys could go to the nourishment sorrow ate when hungry, but consistently returned to the fleecy surrogate for comfort. A babies turn grow into children, their need for belonging is much greater than their need to be 'good' as any parent ha found when they inadvertently pay more attention to 'bad' behaviour than 'good'. Adolescence is marked by a constant battle for belonging, identity, and how to negotiate peer pressure. Even as adults our need to feel included does not fade. In an experiment where three participants are instructed to throw a ball to each other, and then two of the participants are instructed to exclude the third and just throw the ball between each other, the excluded participants consistently reported feelings of loss, and humiliation, even though rationally they know that it is just a silly game that at the end of the day, means nothing! Being part of a group is a powerful thing. Research has found that people who exercise together, study together or work together, consistently perform better on individual tasks than those who do it alone. God created us with a deep set need to belong. It is not a weakness to need others to support you and encourage you, it is how God made you! We're not designed to be independant, we are designed to be in community, needy and needed. This verse in John is so powerful because it speaks to a deep need in our souls. You belong. Don't listen to the lies Satan whispers into your heart that no-one loves you, that you're an outcast, unlovable, a burden, weird, or that people will always let you down so don't let them in. Don't buy into the lies! The truth is that you belong to God's family, and he will never let you go. Hold onto this truth in your heart - you belong.
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